Bao's weblog


Meandering thoughts of a Bay Area college student… be prepared for some bipolar vocabulary

A commendation

I commend Kevin in his role as assassin. To be an assassin, one must demonstrate not only cunning prowess with your murder weapons, but to maintain a sense of balance between your offensive and defensive natures. Ying and yang.

Kevin, so far, maintains a second place rank in the game. But don’t forget, the scoreboard is only a secondary bonus in a game where survival is absolutely paramount. Kevin, by sheer luck and circumstance, managed to survive two attempts on his life.

It was during seventh. A lone challenger walked up to an unsuspecting Kevin, who was innocently walking from “A” building. The challenger had but one objective in mind: irradicate Kevin. His heart pulsed ever so harder as he neared his target. Adrenaline raced through his blue veins. His eyes grew larger, giving more visual input to his excited brain. He was in a different mindframe. A deadlier mindframe. This is what I live for, why I took on such a horrendous job. For the excitement, the rush. Within seconds he was mere feet away from Kevin. With a fluid motion, he pulled out a poisoned weapon he himself had personally crafted with obsession and dedication. Time seemed to slow and noises were distorted. He thrusted…

What the hell? He looked down at his arm. No! Kevin had parried his blow with a grab to his wrist. He stared in horror at his seemingly invincible target. His weapon lay pointless on the pavement.

Only some time later, Kevin would again escape from a different assassin.

Good job!


Filed under: General, Mafia, , ,

Major updates on assassin!!!!!… and my life but do you really care?

Well, we have yet ANOTHER development in our little world of assassins. For those of you who are complaining about the snail’s pace of this game, it seems as if God has answered your prayers! (not me) Details are sketchy, but a day after seventh period, Teresa was walking back to campus with Thanh. Coincidentally, Audrey was heading along the same way and the three met en route.


“Why Teresa,” admonished Audrey, “you’re looking sad today. Here, let me give you a hug…. HA you’re dead… from my DEATH HUG!”

Teresa :46:52 PM): she hgged me
Teresa9:47:42 PM): it was rather sudden

  and unexpected



   There is more to this hug of death then meets the eye. Cleverly disguised as a harmless ball point pen is a concealed knife. While trapping her victim in her death hug, Audrey stabbed Teresa’s back over fifty-six times!!! 0_0Current standings:

Saurav: 2 kills
Kevin: 1 kill
Audrey: 1 kill
Nam: 0 kills
Marcus: 0 kills
Van: 0 kills
Stanley (deceased): 1 kill First blood
Igor (deceased): 1 kill
Vikki (deceased): 0 kills
Eddie (deceased): 0 kills
Martin (deceased): 0 kills
Teresa (deceased): 0 kills

The future seriously freaks me out. What kind of problems lay ahead that I can see? SATs, college, summer classes, ap classes, Australia. Just thinking about this makes my head burst. And just wait, college is gonna be worse. Oh yeah, I’m also unsure of what my majjor will be. For years, I’ve wanted to work in aerospace. Then architecture. And now, maybe civil engineering? So many of my majors will depend on what colleges I make it to. Hopefully before all of that, there will be time for a final summer with friends.

What do I want to do with friends and no parents?
Roadtrip (to Vegas: Saurav)
Plane trip
My house for all 10 seasons of FRIENDS
Sleepover at someone’s place
Sleepover at my place
Sleepover at a hotel
Kayaking and camping enroute
Bike around huge cities like San Francisco, stopping to eat at some random restaurant
Take a cruise
Travel to one of these places:
CHina (Great wall)
New York
Washington D.C.
L.A. Unversal studios and Disneyland/CA adventures

Okay, so obviously I like to travel. Hope we can do this someday

Ohh, and Saurav’s and my favorite: Backpacking ACROSS Europe!

Filed under: General, Mafia, , , , , , ,


Today, the third of April, proved to be a pivotal turning point in our world of assassins. Today, my fellow assassins, we have… a new pack leader! For days and days, I have been waiting for a brave soul, a courageous soul, to step up and take action! We are now honoring this brave one. Our new leader is… Saurav! Yaaay!

What happened you may ask? Well, that question only contributes to the skill and expertise of Saurav’s techniques. How? Saurav commited a valid kill in the middle of a crowd… our crowd. That’s right. Beneath the noses of eight plus people, well over the maximum amount of witnesses required to make the kill invalid, the murder took fruition. The victim’s cries went unheard.

This kill also provides a strategic advantage for the rest of the players. Saurav has successfully assassinated Igor, who was until today, tied for first.

Current standings:

Saurav: 2 kills
Kevin: 1 kill
Nam: 0 kills
Marcus: 0 kills
Teresa: 0 kills
Van: 0 kills
Audrey: 0 kills
Stanley (deceased): 1 kill First blood
Igor (deceased): 1 kill
Vikki (deceased): 0 kills
Eddie (deceased): 0 kills
Martin (deceased): 0 kills

Filed under: General, , , ,


Because I’m completely bored, I’ve decided to keep track of the number of kills each person has. Even though the main objective of the game is to be the last one alive, having the most number of kills can give you some pride =D.

And also, if Teresa starts killing everyone and Nam ends up with no kills and they both are the two remaining…. and Nam wins (scenario given by Martin), then this score system will be taken into account.

So far, Kevin and Saurav are in the lead with one kill each. Stanley had a kill, but died shortly after. Vikki, Martin, and Eddie died with no kills in their favor. Everyone else has zero but are still in the game. For some reason, almost EVERYONE has a large expectation for Teresa. LOL! Hmmm… it’s quiet… TOO quiet.

Kevin: 1 kill
Saurav: 1 kill
Igor: 1 kill
Nam: 0 kills
Marcus: 0 kills
Teresa: 0 kills
Van: 0 kills
Audrey: 0 kills
Stanley(deceased): 1 kill First Blood 😀 Kudos~
Vikki (deceased): 0 kills
Eddie (deceased): 0 kills
Martin (deceased) : 0 kills

Filed under: General, Mafia, , , , , , , , , ,

Last Sunday afternoon

Soo, Sunday afternoon was a fun time at Martin’s house. There was Halo, Mafia, and karaoke. Such fun times even though I regretted sleeping through part of it. I dreamt of a crushing darkness and when I came to, I found people trying to sit on me. 0_0 Truly disturbing as it was, I managed to keep it all in. I swear this isn’t healthy for my psychological half.

Not much to report, since the party wasn’t that interesting. Sure, it was really fun. Before lunch there was Halo3. After lunch there was karaoke. After karaoke was a water gun shootout and Mafia. As usual, I’ve performed spectacularly in the face of two gunmen. Using a single pillar as cover, I fought it out between Eddie and Kevin, with only my gun and arm expose. Ammunition flew everywhere. Water dripped down my barrel.

I fired guiltlessly, over and over again. Worrying about my ammo supply, I gave up each vantage point, one by one, slowy and strategically falling back until I reached my final resort, behind an elaborate fountain. I fired left and right, then spun back behind the pillar. After a sharp exhale, I went at it again, exposing myself. I fired and a stream of water flew between my chin ahd shoulder. Hah! Like such a narrow shot could’ve fazed me. But something was wrong. I was running low on ammunition, but my fire partner was nowhere in sight. I shot my two agressors continuously, yet they appeared to be invincible, unaffected by my fire as it landed at their hearts. THen… I spotted him. There was Van, at the lunch table. What the FUCK was he doing???! So, fighting bravely and skillfully, I’ve come to realize that a warrior knew when to call it quits. Yet another genius thwarted by an incapable assistant. Sorry Van. haha. Maybe next time.

THEN there was another episode where Martin had a garden hose. Ahhh the irony of it. Me and three others with lowly squirt guns taking on what Kevin called “The Spartan Laser.”

During Martin’s party, TWO more victims fell prey to their assassins. Saurav took a poison dart, lured Stanley away from the crowded area, and skillfully took him out. The only evidence of the kill was a bloody dart and a slit throat. Stanley was unwilling to submit to an interview.

BaoWahRaNgErS (9:16:54 PM): how did u feel when saurav murdered u?
stanleytchan (9:17:09 PM): relief
BaoWahRaNgErS (9:17:15 PM): why?
stanleytchan (9:17:40 PM): dont ask too many questions bao….dont question the nature
stanleytchan (9:17:40 PM): lol

Eddie took an invisible bullet to the face. Kevin ingeniously concealed a Glock and coaxed Eddie away from the room. The autopsy showed that Eddie is extremely conceited and that he shouldn’t underestimate his prey (AGAIN) in the future. The “bullet” was found lodged where the spinal cord met the brain, an extremely lethal pressure point. Kevin was extremely proud of his kill. It completely made up for his failed attempt to poison Eddie with pizza.

AilesGrise (9:13:08 PM): i shot him
AilesGrise (9:13:08 PM): like
AilesGrise (9:13:12 PM): a few feet away
AilesGrise (9:20:11 PM): I WAS EXTREMELY PROUD [of my uber pro kill]

Currently, the remaining assassins are: Van, Saurav, Nam, Marcus, Teresa, Kevin, Audrey, and Igor.

Most of you still have two targets to hunt down. Some of you only have one. I’m not gonna elaborate on that, because it’s up to you guys to figure it out. Igor and Kevin, however, had all of their targets eliminated for them. I will assign new ones accordingly and they should expect me to contact them over AIM or at school. I will have new kill lists for them.

And just a little side note, you can expect the next round to have a lot more people in it. The news has spread and more people want to join =] Martin has a lot of work ahead of him. Haha, good luck future god.

Filed under: General, , , , , , , , ,

My spring break

Results from Friday:
A failed assassination attempt on Audrey via poisoned gum took place on the steps after school. The assassin ironically was murdered only a few minutes after his attempt to poison Audrey. Nubcake =]

The deaths of Martin and Vikki also occured on Friday. Two people are killed, leaving 11 remaining players still in play. Vikki’s assassin expressed deep remorse over her death, saying he wishes it didn’t happen as fast. Apologies have been exchanged =D. Wimps… LOL.

And just as a clarification: if you find out that your target is also your assassin, it was NOT a mistake. Keep playing.

A vast expanse of emptiness, mysterious, dotted with white tiny orbs that speak of the distant future.

That’s my spring break schedule.

A whole lot of nothing! Not that I’m complaining =] After Monday at the library and Tuesday at work, there will be absolutely nothing for me to accomplish. So how should I occupy my time? Learn a Yiruma song? Indulge myself in the art of Brawl? Spend as much time as possible on AIM? Or a combination of all of them? Or how about going the opposite direction and study for the damn chemistry test on Tuesday…

Seriously, when are we going to the mall guys!? A schedule for break shouldn’t be so empty you can compare it to space…

Filed under: General, , , , , ,

A successful failure… like Apollo 13 =P

Many searches of why Apollo 13 was a successful failure has inadvertently led many views to this post. I find it kind of unfair, so let me make it up to you! I shall explain everything as much as possible.

Apollo 13 was one spacecraft in a series of 17 I believe. The Apollo program’s purpose? To beat the Russians to the moon. Apollo 13 had many superstitious attacks and comments before launch. It was meant to leave the launchpad at 1:13pm. In military time, that would be 1313 hours. It was due to enter the moon’s orbit on April 13th.

Apollo 13’s flight was barely covered by the media. Apollo 11 and 12 have already successfully landed on the moon already and the media began ranting about how “NASA made landing on the moon as exciting as a trip to Pittsburgh.”

Apollo 13’s bad luck caught up with them after an accidental volatile chemical reaction left their spacecraft crippled. Suddenly, it was a race against time. Energy was in short supply and there was more than enough carbon dioxide. The crewmembers of Apollo 13 would die in a few short days if nothing was done. All of a sudden, a dull and seemingly routine flight was anything but. And as far as the media became concerned about, it was suddenly more exciting and received more coverage then a… trip to Pittsburgh.

So when NASA finally brought back all of the crew members alive, it was nothing short of a stupendous feat. It was a battle against the odds, a limping spacecraft that was missing an entire side of it’s plating, and crewmembers sick from exposure and fatigue. While Apollo 13 never made it to the moon, such genius and capability of NASA’s ground control in bringing the astronauts home alive would leave a mark in history known as “NASA’s finest hour,” or “a successful failure.”

<– a famous photo shot by an Apollo 13 crewmember after detaching from command module’s body. I think if you examine the picture closely, you can appreciate the sheer severity of this situation. This is the closest time that NASA had ever lost men in space (other disasters resulting in death happened inside the atmosphere, such as  Apollo 1 fire, Challenger, and Columbia) Image from

Scene 2:

Setting: Practice Code Red Drill in 4th period


B: You know, it might be a better idea to head off campus if you’re close enough.

M: You’d have a hard time. There’s barely any cover.

B: You can hide in the bushes.

M: Or play dead.

B: Well maybe. But the killer won’t see any blood, just you. He’ll figure out you’re not dead and shoot at you point blank range.

M: Well, all Saurav has to do is strip naked and lie on the dirt.

B: OMG, HELLLA messed up! Racist bastard! haha.


The first assassin game is deemed a successful failure. Failure because I’ve received complaints about clues and some people die waay too quickly. And despite what I thought was an amazing organizational feat in my part as god, more people wanted to play, and too many people died too quickly. Teresa, Eddie, and Edwin died within hours. Teresa wasn’t even sure whether she died or not at first. >.< Successful because everybody seemed to have a lot of fun and things went along smoothly (for awhile).

So okay, three extra players have joined the game. Also posted shall be additional rules.

Player roster:
1. Martin
2. Van
3. Vikki
4. Saurav
5. Eddie
6. Nam
7. Marcus
8. Teresa
9. Edwin
10. Kevin
11. Audrey
12. Igor

If you’ve read this post, please inform as many people as possible on the roster as possible to call me or leave me a message on AIM about their two clues.

Here’s the new part. The clues may be as obscure and vague as you want. It’s the assassin’s responsibility to figure it out for themself. Torture them or drug their chocolate milk and I won’t give a damn. If the clues are too hard, that’s your problem. On the flip side, if you’ve given a clue and your assassin figures it out too quickly… you shall be laughed at. (even though this time around it was totally my fault.)

Your opponent must recognize that he/she has been killed. That totally adds to the hilarity of the game. (this rule is still pending. Martin must see it first.)_

No more than five people can witness the murder. You and your victim don’t count.

The game starts for you the instant you receive your kill assignment.

I’m adding a new safezone also: Eddie’s and Edwin’s house. Since they live together, I don’t want a silly game to interfere with their normal lives outside of school =P

And just so you know, the names I pick are totally random. I tear paper with each of you guys’ names and throw them all into a bowl. Soo if you don’t get the person you want to kill, don’t bitch about it to me =]

If you want in on the game, gather yourself and two other people, or else there will be extra people. Please notify me by today. You must be willing to commit yourself to the game =]

Anything otherwise and god shall smite you. =P

Filed under: General, Mafia, , , ,

IMPORTANT!!! Highlight font to read

You guys already know the general rules and objectives of our upcoming Assassin game. But there are more detailed rules Martin and I have created to maintain fairness of the game and for obvious safety issues. Some rules will be repeated in this list for emphasis. 

1. For a “kill” to be valid, it must be carried out in such a way that a) there are very few witnesses, preferably none b) the victim must be caught off guard. Any kills committed otherwise will be deemed invalid and you will lose your element of surprise. The victim still lives to play.

2. “Safe zones” are areas dubbed by the GMs (Martin and Yours truly) where no kills may take place. Gameplay still continues. The safe zones ARE: a) bathrooms b) classes c) work places. You may not kill a victim walking in or out of a safe zone, but you may assassinate him or her while she’s en route.

3. No “CHEAP SHOTS!” Ex: poison on doorknobs.. 4. No teams. It won’t work anyways. Van, Vikki, and I found out during lunch today. =P

 5.  Weapons may not be sharp enough to puncture skin or be hazardous in any way. Anybody caught attempting to kill a victim with such a weapon is automatically out for the round. Any further offenses of such nature may result in you being banned permanently

6. Direct kills are stabs, shootings, etc. If a kill is indirect (for example, a poisoned food source) you must have a way to prove to the victim that the food has been tampered with. You could, say, pour hot sauce into pasta, or tape a piece of paper with “POISON” written on it to the lunch tray. You must WITNESS the victim’s death for it to be valid and to see if the victim is surprised or not.

7. For now, each of you will have two targets, but also have two people hunting you down. Games begin when you’re given your kill assignments by the narrator, moi.

Oh and one more thing…Each kill must be reported to me, and I will ask the victim to confirm. HONOR SYSTEM PPLZ

Contents by Bao Pham

Posting by ABXi


Filed under: General, Mafia, , ,

Final roster:

Filed under: Mafia, ,

Is life a game?

The victim eats unaware of the two deceiving eyes focusing on the back of his exposed head from afar. The eyes glare intensely and an outsider would wonder why the victim’s head didn’t burn and smoke from the glare’s strength. The assassin stealthily moves forward, crouched, his eyes still staring intently at his prey. He reaches into his pocket… and pulls out a dull grey knife, a knife with a sinister purpose. He attacks… and releases a blood curling scream. The quarry looks back towards the source of the yell and his eyes betrayed horror. The knife lands right in the throat… and rips. The knife was made from paper.

“HA, you’re DEAD!” declares the assassin.

“… Fuck,” is the response of the murdered victim. The hired gun walks away, triumphant, marching back to the mystifying masked maestro to be assigned his next target. He never makes it back… being gruesomely murdered by a fluffy white sock thrown from afar.

Well my friends, welcome to the world of Assassin where friends are pitted against each other and fight to the death! I was so excited about this game that I just had to release some of this excitement. This will make life definitely more interesting.

In this game, you actually get to “kill” your victim. Each person has their own victim, assigned by the ref or the maestro. AND while each person has a victim to kill, he/she him/herself (rearranging it improperly provides amusing results =P) is also a prey of an unsuspecting friend. As you can all see, it’s all a huge circle of murder, paranoia, and deceit. Friends annihilate each other through direct contact whether it’s a cleverly concealed paper knife, a surprise green squirt gun, or a “Have a nice day!” sticker. In the end of these horrific battles, there may be only one left standing. Will it be you? Or will you be among the others, your blood shed, and your corpse sitting lifelessly, copying notes in math class?

Because of the prolonged existence of each round (estimates range between 1-2 weeks per), players could be provided with an incentive to survive: It’d be so mundane to be dead right? You’d be doing homework and studying while someone is mercilessly raped behind your back. Your head will turn and you’ll have a longing look in your eyes. People around you will get the wrong idea…

Yours truly


To be recruited:

If you would like to be in this game and you go to EVHS, feel free to contact Martin or me for entry, target assignments, etc. Game to commence soon and a meeting will be scheduled to establish ground rules and target assignments. (I think) for further details, you may talk to Martin! =D Yes, there will be rules. We can’t shoot each other during AP right?


Filed under: General, Mafia,