Bao's weblog


Meandering thoughts of a Bay Area college student… be prepared for some bipolar vocabulary

8 days. Just an update for now.

Yet again, I break my promise of delivering one post per week. And yet again, I’ll apologize profusely to myself and to whoever keeps track of this blog.

But, at least I have a lot to talk about. I found a pretty interesting picture that, in my opinion, puts a whole new meaning to “survival of the fittest.”

(This photo is a courtesy David Cenciotti’s weblog, found at I also added his website to my blogroll.

*Insert lame joke about luck and rabbit’s foot here… although technically a hare. I guess a hare’s foot is luckier than a rabbit’s.* AHH, THERE’S THE JOKE.

The planes that just missed killing the rabbit belong to the Italian Aerobatic Team. I found that picture pretty funny and amazing at the same time, although it certainly wouldn’t be funny if one of the aircraft had struck the rabbit. Bad for the rabbit, but definitely bad for the aircraft hitting it and the pilot in it.

Oh by the way, the guy that let me use the picture, Mr. Cenciotti, is EPIC. He’s a private pilot and used to used to be a member of the Italian Air Force. He’s an expert on aviation and has been interviewed on radio, newspapers, and television. I thought it was hella crazy getting a personal email from him letting me use one of his photos. I half-expected him never to reply.


My first week of fall quarter has just ended and the second week will begin tomorrow. I would like to heavily emphasize on the fact that commute is a bitch if you don’t have someone to carpool with. I always take 101 North and switch to I-280N, then switch to I-85 to reach De Anza Community College. On a good day, it normally takes around 20 minutes. On my first day of classes, the ride took an hour and a half. I left 45 minutes early to get to class and arrived 45 minutes late. Thank God my professor doesn’t take attendance during lectures.

This quarter I’m taking another argumentative speech class (I think I’m falling in love with arguing), a more advanced class of calculus, and a more advanced class of physics. I took care of most of my math homework and decided to blog. I have yet to begin on physics or my reading for speech, which is 27 pages of sheer text… but I’m a fast reader so no worries. =P

I also have a crush on physics. She seems fun for now, but I barely got to know her at all. I really hope this relationship develops, because I’ll be seeing a lot of her in my life if I decide to keep going with my aerospace major.

Calculus for me… is like a cruel yet beautiful… bitch. She’s the type of gal that always steps on you, and yet you keep crawling back to her every time. I actually don’t know why I even like her. I take it back, calculus is not beautiful. She’s… okay she has her moments. Some parts of her are amazing. The rest are… eh. I bet they’re all make up.( -__-) But while I’m busy with calculus and physics, I don’t think I’ll have time to look for a real girlfriend, let alone have an actual relationship with her… at least not until I become smarter.

Overall, I think my career path so far is the correct one. I recently found out that I can take pages and pages of notes on a fighter plane and have a blast while I’m at it.

This year will be my second year at De Anza. Soon I’ll sign a TAG for a UC, probably UCI. Meanwhile, I’ll apply to UCSD, UCD, UCLA (no chance there). However, at least half of my applications will probably be sent to universities outside of California. For example, I know that the University of Illinois has an amazing aerospace program. There’s also the USAF Academy (no shot there, either). But one of the options in my life I’m playing around with at the moment is a career in the Air Force, but you can’t fly if you don’t have a Bachelor’s Degree in a hard science or engineering major. Anyways, I’ll have to discuss my options with my counselor, as well as when I can begin applying.

So there’s pretty much my academic life at the moment.

My social life, however, is at stagnant as ever. I’ve devoted so much time to studying that I spend most of my break in the library, only leaving its confines for classes, lunch, or to go home. I’ve made several acquaintances, of course, and met one new person that I study with at the library about twice a week.

I also got into an argument with the co-author of this blog. Actually, it wasn’t really an argument, but it would’ve potentially turned into one if I haven’t decided that I’ll have none of it and curtailed the conversation. I guess the good thing is that we didn’t actually argue. That’s damage control for you. However, we left things in the air. Going over the conversation, it doesn’t seem as bad. Nevertheless, I’m not really sure if Eddie wants to talk to me at the moment, so I’ll just take the opportunity to apologize to him here and let him IM me whenever he wants. So then, I’m sorry for insulting your martial art. Obviously I didn’t intend to. Hell, I didn’t even realize I was being insulting until it was too late.

On a similar note, I caught one of my friends yesterday talking about how much he drank at an outing before driving home “sober.” None of them noticed, but I was trembling with anger at that moment at how lightly he took DUI. There’s actually a pretty angry and sad story behind this, but only a few people know about it… including my friend now that I think about it. I suppose it was mostly mended when everyone else talked about things like, “Wtf, did you even wait before you got into the car?” and he replied with “Yeah, I waited until I was sober.”

“How sober?”

“Around an hour or so when I got this blinding headache. You’re sober when you have a headache!”

“So you drove home with a huge headache?”

Well, that’s enough talking for now. See, I told you that I’ll have more to talk about when classes began. I didn’t blog as frequently because there simply wasn’t anything to talk about. Ironically, I might not blog much because I’m too busy with classwork. At least when I do get to blog, I’ll be so full of things to rant about.



Filed under: General

My fail

My sleek F-16C fighter, armed to the teeth, roared gracefully along the coast as it patrolled the border. All seemed quite normal. Suddenly a rapid succession of beeps rang inside the cockpit. Alarmed, I scanned my radar, saw the bandits, and ran over my notes on how to lock on.

1. FCR shown in left MFD, OSB1 above CRM, press to select ACM Master Mode. SHIT! Where’s OSB1?!!?! WHAT is OSB1?What the fuck do I do? What the– oh here it is! YES!

I thanked my lucky stars as I found and clicked that extremely obscure grey square button that looked like many of the… other… grey square buttons. My left MFD (basically a screen displaying radar information at the moment) changed to a different mode. Crap, they’re getting closer. What was step 2 again?

2. 1st ACM submode is 30×20 HUD scan mode. NO RAD until submode selected.

3. Enter 1st submode, 30×20 HUD. VMS will call “Lock.”

Wtf is this gibberish!? Okay, stay calm man. Soo, I’m in 1st submode. No… wait, no I’m not…? WAIT! YES! I’M IN!

And lo and behold, the female voice in the cockpit called “Lock,” and I saw a square light up, highlighting the enemy aircraft. But it was for less than a second as the fighter flew past me and the computer lost it’s lock on the enemy. DAMMIT! I turned my F-16 ninety degrees, until it was literally standing on its wing, as I turned hard to try to get behind the plane. I glanced at my notes.

Note: Vertical Scan ACM submode is 10×60. (Radar sweeps ten degrees horizontally and sixty degrees vertically).

So it scans vertically, but I’m vertical right now, soo it would technically scan horizontally… and highlight the enemy again. SWEET! Okaaay, that would be useful if I KNEW how to get to it!

“Warning! Warning! Missile lock! Counter! Counter!”


Exits program.

That was my first aerial encounter with enemy fighters on Falcon 4.0 Allied Force. Haha, I miss I normal games where I saw a plane and simply let loose instead of switching through a thousand radar functions. It’s like… learning how to operate an extremely complicated Ti-84 graphing calculator… while getting shot at =P

Filed under: General

I know it’s a little early

Perhaps it’s because it’s been colder than usual or it’s beginning to get dark after eight. Whatever the reason may be, I’m starting to feel the holiday feeling in the air! Normally I consider the holiday season to have started when I see the first Thanksgiving commercial or the upcoming Christmas deals… haha I feel incredibly materialistic as I typed that out. At least I’m free from that this year.

I absolutely can’t wait for the plans for the holiday. The lights at Santana Row are absolutely incredible… bit romantic as well. Are you reading this Sumin? You too Xi! Xi and I promised to spend a day with each other during winter break eating ramen for lunch and Benihana’s for dinner (For those of you who don’t understand, this is a true story: my pen-pal from Hong Kong thought we were a gay couple because I talk about him a lot… and this went on for a few weeks before she finally asked). To sweep all bro-mance aside, we’ll probably invite more people so it wouldn’t be just the two of us on a date.  Damn, he’d be mortified if he read this. There’s going to be Christmas in the Park, a grand tradition amongst our group of friends.

picture from (I hope they don't sue me for using this image)

Holy crap, it's the holiday armadillo!!!

This year, we’re also planning to do Secret Santa. It’ll be difficult finding a time to meet so we can draw all of our names from the hat or bucket… whatever we’re using. Anyways, I believe I’m the one planning the Secret Santa thing so you should AIM me if you want to participate.

I think I know what some of you are thinking. “Is this guy for real? It’s barely the middle of September!”

My response is, “Can’t stop a guy from dreaming!”


Oh right, it looks like I really am going to hike on Sunday, with or without company. I absolutely can’t fucking wait!!

(And right, for now I’m back to my usual cheerful self. I don’t know how long it’ll last but I’ll have as much as I can before I revert back.)

Filed under: General

Protected: What’s it gonna take?

This content is password protected. To view it please enter your password below:

Filed under: General

What’s happening to me?

Oh shit.

I don’t remember the last time I’ve felt like this, but it definitely wasn’t long ago enough. I feel… like, an impending sense of doom. Like I’m literally going to die soon. My arms feel weak. I’m not feeling as if I’m getting enough air even though I’m breathing normally. I feel overwhelmed. I kind of want to break down and cry. Everything now just seems too much.

I don’t get it; this isn’t me. I never feel this way. Why can’t I deal with this right now? Here’s the kicker: I don’t even know what I’m so scared to death of. It just hit me and I suddenly felt clammy and no longer confident at anything. I’m in such a bad shape right now.

I’m supposed to be stronger than this. Why did I suddenly become reduced to such a sad person? I don’t even have the strength to feel disgusted at myself.

Filed under: General


That’s how I want to end this summer… because two weeks from now I will be returning to the bittersweet life of being a college student. I think nearly all of us have a love-hate relationship with the college life.

I really don’t know what I’ll do. Most likely, I’ll hike. Actually, yes, it sounds perfect. I kind of want to end my summer in the Hollywood style, stereotypical way… with a cheesy sunset. And there I’ll sit on the grass, watching the sun slowly drift beneath the horizon… pondering about the meaning of life… stuff. I’ll bring along a simple meal, probably a long baguette with some pâté and some water. Just thinking about it gets me really excited.

NO. No wait. I’ll bike. Yes. I shall bike. There’s a trail that leads from Silver Creek all the way to Gilroy.

The thing is hiking is fun with friends and with yourself. With biking… I would prefer company. So my plan is to bike if I have people with me. Else, I’m going to strap on my boots, grab my pack, and just hike.

I’ll tell you guys all about it. This post is more so I won’t forget that I have plans next Saturday, so it won’t be as long or as colorful.


Filed under: General

My checklist

As I tossed and turned at 1:30 in the morning trying my hardest to fall asleep, it hurt like a bitch. I couldn’t breathe through one nostril because it was stuffed. I was coughing like crazy. And I had a pain in my chest that throbbed with each heartbeat. I started planning out my own funeral because I thought I was going to die. I had a mental guest list… obviously I can’t control that when I’m gone but I had a list of people I thought would care enough to come. Yeah, last night was extremely uncomfortable.

I reached person 42 and stopped in wonder. It’s amazing when you think about how many lives you’ve touched. Thinking through my coughs, I thought about the people that might miss me. Then I began to feel guilty. I reached my 3rd draft of my guest list. It seems like every time I start over, I have a different number of people attending. How can I leave someone out? Do I mean more to them then they mean more to me? Then I told myself to stop it; I was being disgustingly conceited.

Then I started thinking if I was qualified to reach heaven. The criteria isn’t as complicated as you’d think, yet surprisingly many people would fail. And God doesn’t grade on a curve. It was ten commandments time. I failed on the 3rd one: thou shalt not take thy Lord’s name in vain. I’ve quit saying ‘goddammit’ for one or two years now. I wonder if ‘Oh my God’ counts, but it’s usually something like “Oh my God this is awesome!”

I would also fail nine: Don’t lie. And ten: You shalt not covet.

Well… that’s a 7/10… I wonder if a C is good enough for God… Better not take any chances. I prayed that night begging him for forgiveness for all I’ve done wrong. And I would’ve paused and listened for a response, but then a small headache popped up.

Sometime between 2 or 3 I finally died a most painful death. And when I woke up at around 10, it was still painful. As I type this up at 3:52 p.m., my chest is still killing me. Ah well, I hope I get better soon.

I hate how I don’t get sick overnight like some people. I slooowly start to get sick over the span of one or two weeks. It’s annoying as hell.


Filed under: General