Bao's weblog


Meandering thoughts of a Bay Area college student… be prepared for some bipolar vocabulary


Today I was trapped in the “enviable” position of taking a calculus midterm… enviable in this case being used sarcastically unless applied to someone like Eddie. (Oh yeah, he loves math so much I bet that if anyone left a calculus problem as a comment he won’t be able to rest until he solves it) It was most annoying not because I didn’t know how to tackle a problem but because I made all of these little errors that had to be found and corrected. Therefore, a simple two minute problem took as long as ten.

Then came problems I’ve never seen before.

I studied them for what seemed like eternity. Screw it. I guessed if I wrote some stuff down, I’d at least get partial credit. I began writing and b.s.-ing my way through the problems. Then.. wait! Does that actually work? I punched my b.s. into my calculator and out came the line perfectly tangent to the weirdest curve I’ve ever seen. Then I did it with the next problem. And the next. Fiddled some numbers around… time and time again my calculator happily displayed confirmation that my b.s. was, in fact, too epic.

Victory was fucking mine…

I hope.

The thing with b.s. is that when you leave the test, you know your answers make sense. But you don’t know if they’re 100% dead on. For now, however, my mind exults.

Another class that requires much b.s.-ing is my argumentative speech class. They basically teach you how to engage in parliamentary debate. It’s a difficult task because you can’t prepare your rebuttals since you can only guess how your opponents will defend or attack an issue. Therefore, you take quick notes and get your thoughts together because as soon as they finish, it’s your turn to counter. Any piece of pure and utter crap that comes out of your mouth can and will look hella good if you present it right.

And yes.

Perhaps 80% of the words that come out of your mouth during a parliamentary debate is b.s. in its finest form. We can’t claim to be experts in every field. So whether the topic for debate is Lady Gaga or foreign arms sales to former Warsaw Pact countries…(you also can’t pick whether you’re for or against a topic)  you have to be ready for anything.


Ooh, there may be some words that are unfamiliar to you.

B.S. – a slang. It means improvising or when telling a lie. Short for BullShit. Example?

Tom: I am awesome.
Jerry: That’s b.s.

Hella – it’s another slang. Means “really” or “very”. Originated from San Francisco. Example?

Tom: I am hella awesome.
Jerry: That’s hella b.s. right there.



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