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Meandering thoughts of a Bay Area college student… be prepared for some bipolar vocabulary

Chuc mung nam moi

Another blog post on the go.

I’m at my grandmother’s. Here’s another story that’ll go in my mental history book. Well, my parents are extremely reverent of my grandmother. (I am, too, but their reverence is like, almost religious). A favorite new year’s tradition for my grandmother is trying to cram me with as much food as humanly possible. This in itself presents a fundamental problem that my grandmother and my parents fail to realize. All of their food can make you full after you take a single bite. We have things such as Banh Chung, chicken, these beef cakes, and banh bao. Not to be disrespectful, but more to be humorous… have they ever heard of a goddamn salad?

Anyways, my parents’ respect for my grandmother is absolutely fricking insane. I’m sitting on a couch meant for two people. I’m sitting on the very edge. My parents literally yell, “Scoot over scoot over!” So now instead of taking the space of 3/4ths of a person (I’m pretty skinny), I’m cramming myself to the very edge even more, probably leaving room for another half a person to sit next to me.

And to combat my grandmother’s hobby of force feeding me with filling food, I tried taking around five minutes a bite just… chewing. My grandmother goes (translated from Vietnamese)

“Why does your son take so long to chew? Oh my God, you guys took him to all these dentists. Didn’t they take out eight of his teeth?”

My parents (a bit defensively) “Yes. The first four were for his braces. They were necessary. And the last four were for his wisdom teeth. Everyone in the U.S. does it!”

“At this rate, he won’t have anymore teeth when he gets older! When I was young, I never had to yank out any of my teeth. And now look! He has a hard time chewing now! Bao, open your mouth so I can see your teeth!”

I give her a blank stare, unsure of what I’ve heard. So then I turn to my parents.

My mom goes, “Bao show her your teeth!” My dad goes, “Open! Open up!”

I open my mouth and a loud and long “WTF” emanated in my mind… yet another wacky new year’s story to keep.

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Filed under: General

2 Responses

  1. map0wt0fu says:

    hahahahaha, gotta love the grandparents. My grandma was trying to give me a hug but she ended up just patting my butt xD hahahaha.

    Happy Tet by the way 😀

  2. teriyakifan says:

    Aww… lol! What an amusing story =P Or well… for me… probably not for you xD I hope you had a great New Years nonetheless. And that you’re not experiencing like… a food coma or acid reflux from all the food or anything 😉

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