Bao's weblog


Meandering thoughts of a Bay Area college student… be prepared for some bipolar vocabulary

I hate fillers

because that’s what they do. They “fill” empty space. They’re nothing special. They piss me off. That last post was, to me, a filler. I want to make every post mean something to me. Lately, each one brings me a different feeling from the next, be it sadness or euphoria.

I still enjoy blogging. I don’t see myself just stopping anytime soon. After all, this website is the only concrete proof (besides a perishable birth certificate and passport) that I exist in this world. I like to think that I’m unique, but I doubt that’s true. It’s actually somewhat comforting that I know people go through the same things in life that I do. It’s not as scary when you feel a certain way then find out through your friend’s blog that he or she had felt that way just several days ago. They’ve pulled through. They’re still alive! What’s the big deal!?

My friend had me take this quiz. Results?

You value your friendships: 60%

You love your friends very much – so much so that it’s actually quite a worry. You may not be able to cope very well when you do lose somebody’s friendship. You are a very sensitive and fragile person, and are therefore likely to get upset easily. You care for your friends and are willing to do anything that they ask you to do. Sometimes this can make your friends think that you are a bit of a nuisance. Nevertheless, people do really love you because your highest priority is your friends.


I do NOT get upset easily. Sometimes I sniffle during movies. Haha! I remember 2012, when the black guy was talking to his father who was on a cruise. And the father had this monologue.  I’m not that sensitive or that fragile of a person…. not mentally… though I bet even Teresa could break my arm if she thought about it. I care for my friends and am willing to do anything they ask me to do. Reading through that sentence, the word “masochist” comes to mind. Haha, but this reminds me of a conversation I had with Martin last night. Yeah I meant it all. If I was independent and my parents didn’t give a tiny rat’s ass, I’d give myself a 50% chance I’ll drive down there to hang out with you. At 10 p.m. …sometimes this can make you guys think that I’m a bit of a nuisance. Please tell me that’s not true you pricks 0_0. Nevertheless, people do really love me because my highest priority is my friends.

My highest priority is college. But fine, friends and family come in second by a hair (like the short ones on my head, not the long ones that girls have… ya)

I miss this. I blog and blog about these “feelings” and about death. I can’t believe I can still just talk about the every day things. Totally made up for the last post.

Tonight, Martin and I took a trip down memory lane to the time when we drove to Sweet Tomatoes once a month after 5th period. It probably was a bitch of a commute, but we always had a blast. It’s a shame we can’t redo those blissful months. Teresa once asked me where’d I go if I had a time machine. I think I answered that I’d relive my 18th birthday. I change my mind. I’d relive my 18th birthday along with every following minute until high school is over.

You could argue that those days to follow were fillers. But there’s nothing filler-esque about high school life and Sweet Tomatoes!



Filed under: General

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