Bao's weblog


Meandering thoughts of a Bay Area college student… be prepared for some bipolar vocabulary

At journey’s end…

I know that recently, all of my posts have either been protected or about card tricks. Since this one isn’t protected, it’ll be about magic a destination I’ve reached and some thoughts about my training to become someone other than an ordinary college student. In other words, magic! 😀 I’m really excited. I try my hardest to slowly ween off of this topic, so maybe this will help.

I find it hard to believe that five to six months ago, I was utterly baffled and awed at Jennifer’s prowess when she showed me an epic card trick that still catches me off-guard today (Marcus, Nam, and Jennifer herself deemed it simple but WTF!) However, six months worth of self-training and countless random audiences had led me to… last Friday. It’s sad really, but that was the day that all of my efforts were focused on, because it was the day I met Jennifer. She’s still awesome as usual 😀 but I still had no quelms making her feel how I’ve felt the last six months. I’ll give myself a golden sticker and an A+ because everything went off without a hitch and I had left her dazed, confused and hopefully extremely impressed. Still, it was disappointing for me, because I sort of expected something inside of me to release. Maybe I was looking for a profound moment that Hollywood sterotypes oh so well with tears, sweeping music, and a single awesome line, usually “I love you,” or “And that’s when it hit me.” But instead, all I could think of was

so now what?

With Jennifer threatening vengeance, I don’t see any further purpose in learning card tricks. People always say that quality is better than quantity. Since a deck of cards is something that seperates me from everyone else, I won’t lose it completely. But why should I learn anymore? So… maybe that’s how it ends. Or maybe that’s how it’ll end with me and begin with her. Who’s going to know?

And that’s when it hit me. Maybe in my search for personality, I’ve unwittingly created my own. There are so many unique people out there that I was terrified of being a mix of the world with none of myself. They say that a large part of who you are is influenced by the events that you participate in and the people who you deemed worthy to be your friends. Hopefully, I’m more than just a combination of the people I’ve met.

On a seperate note, I’ve decided to become more religious. They say that many people believe in God but still walk the path of Satan. I refuse.

On another sperate note, I’m thinking about Vblogging. So whoever doesn’t want to be in it, tell me now. If I hear nothing from you, then I assume you’re fine with it or you don’t go on here anyways (whatever you don’t know won’t hurt you :D)

My phone was recording while leaning inside that one area between my car when it caught this…

Filed under: General

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