Bao's weblog


Meandering thoughts of a Bay Area college student… be prepared for some bipolar vocabulary


eBao… eBay. eBao! Am I crazy or is that a good idea???

Hmm, what should eBao be about?

My name is probably one of the most versatile names in the entire school of Evergreen Valley High School. It’s also one of the most fun to mess around with. Bah-bah-Bao! B-B-B-B-BAO! Bao! Bao! Bao! You can make songs with lyrics comprising of just Bao’s. You can play with a twist of words. Bao to your master! Bao to me! Bao to Bao! It’s also, ironically, one of the hardest names to say. Those of you who are reading this and don’t know me may think, “Bao… is it pronounced… Boa? Or… Bale? Bahao?” Well fyi fellow readers, it’s pronounced bow, as in Bao to me.

The Vietnamese pronounciation… ah that’s another story completely. I find it hard to believe that so many people can’t say it correctly in Vietnamese. It seems so easy! But I guess that’s because… psh obviously.

Someone once said on his away message: All Tinas are sluts. No offense!
All I could do was… 0_0

I could go rant on and on about my past few months at EVHS. But no. It’s not worth mentioning about in this blog.

Act III Scene 1

(Setting: French 3, 4th period, French reading time, Michelin tourism guide)

Alicia: (pronouncing the sentence flawlessly and without hesitation) Les touristes peuvent facilement choisir les hôtels et les restaurants qui correspondent à leurs goûts… et à leurs ressources financières.

Saurav: (with much hesitation) Uhh.. Michelin est l’une des pluls (plus, as in “ploo” how do you mispronounce ploo?).. entreeprises? (entreprises) francais (francaises, genius). Son activité princiaple (principal you moron) n’est pas la publication de guides (prounouced geeds you….. iashkl dghs) touristiques, mais la fabrication des PUH-news. (pneus, pronounced news)

(Bao , Nivita, and Martin snickers)

Saurav: Shut up guys. Shut the fuck up.

Bao: PUH-neu Saurav? PUH-neu?

Martin: My god, Saurav.’

(Fifteen minutes later)

(Martin remembers incident and starts laughing)

Saurav: What?

Bao: (turns around) PUH-neu Saurav?

Saurav: OMFG. Hey it’s not as bad as Martin’s incident!

Martin: Alright, I’ll stop Saurav.

Sauravv: That’s what I THOUGHT!

Martin: Wow Saurav.

**FLashback to previous incident**

(French compostion today)

Mme. Weiss: Okay. Here’s your prompt.

Prompt: Your parents are out on Friday and you must go to your friend’s place. But wait! Il y a une probleme! Your parents left you with chores. Yada yada yada…

Martin: (stares in horror) Oh… my… God. (Turns around to Saurav frantically) Sauravv Saurav! PLEASE! How do you say Friday in French!?

Saurav: … what the hell? (starts smiling) Are you kidding me?

Martin: Dammit! (starts fake crying)

Saurav: How the HELL did you pass French one?

Martin: (finally realizing that Saurav won’t be much help) Bao! How do you say Friday!?

Bao: (WAAY too busy laughing)

Martin: sdfjkl lsdjgasdk;

(Aftermath: Martin managed not to say “Friday” even once in his composition. (Vendredi) We never bothered to ask for his score.)

eBao SHALL be the world’s ULTIMATE website for.. accurate simulations of ANYTHING! Experience virtual reality through this website. Would you like to kill someone you hate? Can’t get the girl of your dreams? Want to experience the extraordinary? This amazing website will let you travel anywhere. Fly a kite in Iraq! Take a walk in space! With this crazy website, you shall undertake the most astonishing journeys of your life any day you wish and from anywhere you please.


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